I’m begining to have a backlog of posts I keep meaning to write. The problem is by the time I get home, I’m tired of writing on the computer and don’t feel like blogging. Instead, I watch youtube videos until it’s prime time TV hour(s). Speaking of which, I’ve been watching so much cable reality shows (a la, “Keeping Up with the Kardashians”), it’s kind of weird to watch sit-coms again.

Um, anyway, since I haven’t written in a while, I thought I’d share something I got in my email today. A year ago I did this thing called 10Q, where you answer 10 questions over the course of 10 days, and have it sent to you a year later.

Reading over my answers has helped me realize that while a lot has changed in a year, not much really has, at least as far as my feelings/perspective go. But without further ado, here are my answers to questions you didn’t even know I was asked (my “today” reflections are in italics):

Day 1:
Describe a significant experience that has happened in the past year. How did it affect you? Are you grateful? Relieved? Resentful? Inspired?

Your Answer:

This past year I got a boyfriend. It was definitely a roller coaster of a ride (it was me adding all the sharp turns and loops), but I think I learned a lot about myself by learning a lot about another person. I learned that I can be just has crazy as the next girl, but also just as loving. I’m grateful for this relationship, this experience, and would never change one minute of it.

Ew I’m a cheeseball. Did I really write a roller coaster metaphor? Lazy, lazy writing.

Day 2:
Is there something that you wish you had done differently this past year? Alternatively, is there something you’re especially proud of from this past year?

Your Answer:
I choose to not look back, dwelling on what ifs. That, my friend, is a dark and dangerous road! As for something I’m proud of? I guess I’m proud of my modest accomplishments, but then again they seem tainted by the fact that I could always have done better… ah, the life of a pessimist. Some days I’m just proud I made it out of bed. All in all, it wasn’t a perfect year, but it was a damn good one nonetheless. This year I plan to keep better ties with the people I love, work hard at school/internship/etc., and find a job!!!

I think I need to do a better job with the “keeping ties” portion of this, but I DID work hard at school (got a 4.0 my last quarter! [/shameless brag]) and internships, AND GOT A FREAKING JOB BEFORE I GRADUATED YAY.

Day 3:
Think about a major milestone that happened with your family this past year. How has this affected you?

Your Answer:
My brother started college this past year, and it makes me excited because both our futures now seems so much closer to becoming the present! I feel like he has the potential for such an exciting career and I’m maybe looking forward more to that than my own career. The closer I get to graduation, the less glamorous work, and life, seem to be. Right now, at this exact moment I mean, I just want a simple life. I don’t need adventure. I don’t want a challenge. I just want peace.

Yep, work and adult life is definitely unglamorous. But I’m extremely thankful for all that I have nonetheless.

Day 4:
Describe an event in the world that has impacted you this year. How? Why?

Your Answer:

The economy getting worse with no end in sight, despite all the talk of a recession, makes me realize how volatile our situations all are. One day you can be solidly middle class, and the next you can be on the streets. A lot of times I wonder why people who end up like that couldn’t help themselves more. Surely it’s a long way to fall, and couldn’t they have done something to avoid rock bottom? But I’ve never been put in a situation of being laid off, or anything like that, so I can’t really say for sure whether or not it could ever happen to me. But anyway, this is becoming a ramble, and I’ll just end with saying… basically… this shitty economy is making me wish I wasn’t becoming a grown up.

Economy still bad. Very, very bad.

Day 5:
Have you had any particularly spiritual experiences this past year? How has this experience affected you? “Spiritual” can be broadly defined to include secular spiritual experiences: artistic, cultural, and so forth.

Your Answer:
I read “The Year of Living Biblically” by AJ Jacobs, and it inspired me to live more spiritually, in a secular way. I want to start small, by sending out good vibes and appreciating the little things. One idea that I got from the book was how to be thankful for things simply by stating you are thankful for it. For example, if I think about the food I am about to eat, really imagine where it came from and how it ended up on my plate, I can appreciate it more and maybe even better my experience eating it. The only problem is, I keep forgetting to do this… usually I’m so hungry I just want to eat.

I’ve concluded that I’m just not a very spiritual person. Oh well.

Day 6:
Describe one thing you’d like to achieve by this time next year. Why is this important to you?

Your Answer:
Dear Universe, I would like to have full-time job with some sort of notion about what I want to do with my life! Love, Christina

Lesson-learned: full-time job does not equal having any idea what you want to do with your life. But at least it lets you pay rent!

Day 7:
How would you like to improve yourself and your life next year? Is there a piece of advice or counsel you received in the past year that could guide you in this project?

Your Answer:

Oops, guess I was sleeping this day. No answer. Good thing, I guess, since no self-improvement projects were undertaken and acheived. ‘Til next year!

Day 8:
Is there something (a person, a cause, an idea) that you want to investigate more fully in 2011?

Your Answer:
I want to investigate life, my future, my career more fully. Journalism, traveling, love…

Wow, this was an incredibly selfish answer.

Day 9:
What is a fear that you have and how has it limited you? How do you plan on letting it go or overcoming it in the coming year?

Your Answer:
I have a fear of failure. I have problems taking chances, committing to certain things, and often don’t try my hardest because of my fear. It’s like, if you don’t put your heart into it, it can’t break, and I know that’s the wrong way to think about things, but I can’t help it. Sometimes you just gotta take a leap of fate, and I don’t know how exactly I might overcome this in the coming year, but we’ll see how it goes!

Hm, I still seem to have this fear and it still holds me back. I have learned over the year I tend to live very catiously, maybe too catiously, but at the same time, maybe others shouldn’t live so dangerously! Sheesh!

Day 10:
When September 2011 rolls around and you receive your answers to your 10Q questions, how do you think you’ll feel? What do you think/hope might be different about your life and where you’re at as a result of thinking about and answering these questions?

Your Answer:
I think I’ll feel… I dont know… I don’t feel like I was particularly insightful or anything. Maybe I’ll be surprised with how little has changed.

My feelings exactly. Good job, past-me.

Day 11:
What are your predictions for 2011?

Your Answer:
I predict love, laughter, sadness, optimism, disappointment, and joy.

God, what a cop-out of an answer.